Monday, January 31, 2022
Saturday, January 29, 2022
Thursday, January 27, 2022
Pilot glides over beautiful ancient Egyptian architecture | Lifestyle | Independent TV
Sent from my Linux system.
Monday, January 24, 2022
Fwd: I love Texas
And for the record, when I was growing up in Kansas, everyone knew that Texans were a-holes.
-------- Forwarded Message --------
|Subject:||I love Texas|
|Date:||Mon, 24 Jan 2022 17:18:49 +0000|
|From:||Donald J. Trump <email@example.com>|
What are you doing on January 29th?
I'm holding a RALLY in the GREAT STATE OF TEXAS and I want YOU and a guest of your choice to join me BACKSTAGE as my VIP guests.
My team will cover your flight and hotel, and we'll even take a picture together so that we can remember the moment forever.
My team needs to finalize the VIP list soon so I need to know TODAY if you want to come or not. I really want you to join me at my RALLY - I hope you don't let me down.
Hurry, I'm selecting the winner soon and I really want it to be YOU.
Contribute ANY AMOUNT by 11:59 PM TONIGHT for a chance to meet yours truly BACKSTAGE at my RALLY in TEXAS.
Donald J. Trump
45th President of the United States
not too long ago
Save America, PO Box 13570, Arlington, VA 22219
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Sunday, January 23, 2022
Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson.
She was only a moonshiner's daughter, but I miss her still.
What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled.
Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
Just so everyone is clear, I'm going to put on my glasses.
A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone a round.
I lost my job as a stage designer, but I left without making a scene.
Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer.
I once worked at a cheap pizza shop to get by. I kneaded the dough.
My friends and I have named our band 'Duvet.' It's a cover band.
I lost my girlfriend's audiobook, and now I'll never hear the end of it.
Why is 'dark' spelled with a k and not c? Because you can't 'c' in the dark.
Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? Time will tell.
When I told my contractor I didn't want carpeted steps, he gave me a blank stare.
Bono and The Edge walk into a Dublin bar, and the bartender says, "Oh no, not U2 again."
Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it's a whole sentence.
Scientists got together to study effects of alcohol on a person's walk, and the result was staggering.
I'm trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won't lie - it was a rocky road.
What do you say to comfort a friend who's struggling with grammar? There, their, they're.
I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger action figures were, and he replied, "Aisle B, back."
What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up his own incision? Suture self.
I've started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It's all about raisin awareness.
Tuesday, January 18, 2022
Fwd From a friend: Free Covid home tests
Monday, January 17, 2022
A few laughs.
Fish, faults and failures
Don't go in the water ...