Sunday, May 31, 2020

I'm staying in until July to see what happens to you all first.

This may be the best. Or I have been in lockdown way too long.

 

Enjoy these "Random Thoughts":

I hope they give us two weeks' notice before sending us back out into the real world.  I think we'll all need that time to become ourselves again. And by "ourselves" I mean lose 10 pounds, cut our hair and get used to not drinking at 9:00 a.m. 

My new monthly budget:  Gas $0  Entertainment $0  Clothes $0   Groceries $2,799.

Breaking News:  Wearing a mask inside your home is now highly recommended.  Not so much to stop COVID-19, but to stop eating.

When this quarantine is over, let's not tell some people. 

I stepped on my scale this morning.  It said: "Please practice social distancing. Only one person at a time on scale." 

Not to brag, but I haven't been late to anything in over 6 weeks. 

You know those car commercials where there's only one vehicle on the road - doesn't seem so unrealistic these days.

They can open things up next month, but I'm staying in until July to see what happens to you all first. 

Day 57:  The garbage man placed an AA flyer on my recycling bin. 

The spread of Covid-19 is based on two things: 
1. How dense the population is. 
2. How dense the population is. 

Appropriate analogy: "The curve is flattening so we can start lifting restrictions now" is like saying "The parachute has slowed our rate of descent, so we can take it off now". 

People keep asking: "Is corona virus REALLY all that serious?"  Listen y'all, the churches and casinos are closed.  When heaven and hell agree on the same thing it's probably pretty serious. 

Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money. 

Home school Day 21:  I'm trying to figure out how I can get this kid transferred out of my class. 

I'm putting a drink in each room of my house today and calling it a Pub Crawl. 

Coronavirus has turned us all into dogs.  We wander around the house looking for food.  We get told "No" if we get too close to strangers and we get really excited about going for walks and car rides. 

The dum
best thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner ... 
 

  Enjoy your day.  You don't have anything else to do.
--   Sent from my Linux system.

Rube Goldberg would have been envious.

I don't know whether to be envious of the accomplishment, overwhelmed by the number of times this guy had to try this, or just plain awestruck by the collection of junk he assembled.

Glenn

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Last night I dreamt I was being chased by a giant bottle of vodka

It was an Absolut nightmare.

For the rest of the collection of painful puns and memes, follow this link:

https://va.news-republic.com/a/6831257499669103110?app_id=1239&c=sys&gid=6831257499669103110&impr_id=6831324363607836934&language=en&region=us&user_id=6549605740000018441
--   Sent from my Linux system.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Daveeeeeee ... Davy Crockett!!

There are times when I wonder where the hell I'm living. The following happened in my neighborhood. And yes, we do live near a number of wetland critters, but apparently there's more to fear from the human critters.

Glenn

From https://nextdoor.com/

Posted by Name deleted to protect the innocent

neighbour hunting skunks with a bow and arrow. I found a neighbour tonight on the hunt for skunks (I think he might have killed the skunk) with a bow and arrow, apparently they spray around his house (as they spray my house from to time) and he decided, well, he will get rid of them 1 by 1 ... please be on the look out and call USDA and animal services for alameda - I already did, these animals haven't harmed anyone and hunting them outside your own backyard isn't ethical or legal.



--   Sent from my Linux system.

Fwd: Art on buildings




 
Art on buildings - there's no limit to the imagination...
Some people are so creative ...... 
STREET                                                            ARTISTRY
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Ingesloten                                                            afbeelding
 
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(19) Thomas Massie on Twitter: "Merry Christmas! 🎄 ps. Santa, please bring ammo. 🎁 https://t.co/NVawULhCNr" / Twitter

https://twitter.com/RepThomasMassie/status/1467197523127422979?s=20 > Rep. Thomas Massie (R-Ky.) tweeted a Christmas photo of his fam...